Why We Need a New Narrative for Senior Living

Bob Kramer opened his talk at SLIF Spring '25 by sharing a breakthrough from his twenty years of university teaching. For years, he struggled with students' disconnect from aging issues—they saw it as relevant only to grandparents, not their own lives. Then he developed a simple but powerful classroom exercise: asking each student to predict their own lifespan and share it with the class.

When Kramer shows these college and graduate students data proving they have a 50% chance of living to 100, the discussion shifts from "their problem" to "our future." Since implementing this exercise, he's found it changes the entire nature of discussions about aging. This personal connection captures the essence of Kramer's urgent message to the senior living industry.

The Old Narrative Is Broken

Kramer argues that our current aging narrative—built around a model of retiring in your 60s and dying in your 70s—is catastrophically outdated. Today's reality includes many older adults living into their eighties, nineties, and beyond, yet we've simply tacked these extra years onto what we call "old age" rather than recognizing them as an entirely new life stage.

The consequences are profound. By 2040, the average age of someone moving into assisted living is projected to be in the early nineties—meaning there's a full 25 years between traditional retirement and needing care services. As Kramer puts it: "That's a quarter of a century. Yes, we're aging. Everybody's aging, but this is a whole new stage of life."

Four Critical Failures

The current narrative fails on four fronts:

1. It ignores 2025 realities: Our social programs, support networks, and even greeting cards are built around an obsolete lifespan model
2. It doesn't match boomer and Gen X desires: These generations want to thrive, not just survive—they're "more concerned with being useful than youthful"
3. It relies on a crumbling social compact: In a resource-constrained society, framing seniors as burdens puts them at the end of the line for support
4. It exacerbates rather than addresses societal challenges: Instead of recognizing older adults as solutions, we see them only as problems

The Untapped Opportunity

Kramer flips the script entirely, presenting older adults as "the largest untapped workforce in America today" and vital assets for addressing major challenges:

• Workforce shortages: Especially critical given reduced immigration and the high-touch nature of care
• Social capital: Enormous volunteer contributions through mentoring, teaching, and caregiving
• Loneliness epidemic: Older adults can help address alarming isolation rates among young adults
• Healthcare costs: Shifting from "sick care" to "well care" through prevention and proactive management

The Senior Living Transformation

For senior living providers, this narrative shift is existential. Under the old narrative, senior living becomes an 'avoidance setting' - something people want to stay away from because it represents 'the beginning of the end, loss of purpose and of independent agency.' Kramer calls for what he terms a 'next stage narrative' that positions senior living as 'a next stage setting, not an end stage setting,' focused on putting 'life in your years' rather than just years in your life.

This requires fundamental changes:

• Earlier engagement: Building relationships with future residents decades before they need care
• Redefining the value proposition: From "we do everything for you" to "we support you to be all you can be"
• Empowering rather than enabling: Fostering independence and purpose rather than learned helplessness
• Team-based aging: "Aging poorly is an individual sport...aging well is a team sport"

The Stakes Couldn't Be Higher

Kramer's message is both hopeful and urgent. The senior living industry stands at a crossroads: continue with the current narrative and become irrelevant, or embrace the new reality and become aspirational partners in healthy longevity.
As he concluded, communities that successfully make this transition will help residents experience increased longevity as a bonus rather than a burden—creating truly exciting and delightful customer experiences in the process.
The question isn't whether this transformation will happen, but whether senior living will lead it or be left behind by it.

Watch the full video of Bob Kramer's SLIF Spring ‘25 talk below…

Bob Kramer is the founder of Nexus Insights and co-founder and strategic advisor of the National Investment Center for Seniors Housing & Care (NIC). Recognized as one of senior living's most influential thought leaders, he continues to challenge the industry to think differently about aging and care.